In my life I seen many paths, studied many religions sat in many things I don’t care to discuss. I do not mean to offend any man’s religion or beliefs. and honestly I am not telling any you have to believe like me. I once believed in many things. As a kid I found out santa claus was not real, neither was the easter bunny, or the tooth fairy. At one time I even thought God was not real. but unlike santa claus, or the tooth fairy or any of them other bedtime stories. I found God. Or God found me.
I use to cry to this invisible God. I truly had forgotten I prayed to God as a kid and even heard God, for I was able to turn off anything God. I even made myself forget somethings in the past, because I had to, or I would of not went on. So as with many child hood memories I did the same thing to God. I told myself they were not real. I told myself it never happened. and I was able to move on. but that was not real either.
I was living in the past. I was walking around making decisions based off what other’s did to me. I lived my life, but such things were killing me. I had hate in my heart. Vengeance? I was good at it! In fact I was one of the best. Everything I ever tried to do in life I was good at it. But the sad thing as I was not being good. I was doing all these things to fill a void. To be filled up. but not really for it left me empty.
In the well I fell. Deep in the dirt I sank. Rock bottom ? What is that? My whole life is one bottom I thought. I gave up. I got tired. I couldn’t do it anymore. I gave up. Isolated myself. I had been people’s strength for so long. Nobody on earth could cheer me up. It was a sad time in my life friends.
Isolated alone. Me, myself facing my fears. it is cold and lonely. I’m afraid of the dark. When the night wind blows and the demons come out. I keep screaming. nobody hears me. I am alone. it is cold. I am frightened. Hello! I shout! I sigh, I cry. Why can nobody hear? Can anyone see me? Hello? Desolated, pain, torment all around. I am falling, I am falling. My feet seeking ground. Never hitting. always falling. I let out a whisper. I try to scream but my mouth won’t open. Wounded I sit. On the floor I bleed. Not one soul on earth to even see. I cried rivers. I cried oceans. I cried on Jesus. What is this?
My eyes opened I saw myself. a puzzle, a riddle. I am sick of living I said. oh God why? I can’t take it anymore. I tried to end it I thought. God says I have other plans for you. take my hand. I will help you rise. out of mud I will rise you up. I will mend your wounds. I will heal your broken heart. I could not believe! I doubted! God laughed and turned me into a BELIEVER!! It was the best thing in earth I ever seen or saw was when God changed a woman like me! who was not even worthy! My all was missing, it was shattered in a million pieces. Shattered like dust, like ashes being blown I was scattered all around the room and God picked up every single piece and gave it back to me! and I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE!!! I AM A WOMAN MADE WHOLE! Hallelujah!
Only God could turn such a sorrowful poem into a sweet new wonderful tune. I pray these words hit someone like the former me. and may Jesus find you and keep you and put you back together also my friends. In my hour of sorrow I called out to God. God lead me Psalms and seems a lot of people in that Book had sorrow for it is a lot of scripture that tells us cry out to God. and then let us pray GOD turn my tears to joy! AMEN!
it is a WONDERFUL delight to follow Jesus. I suggest any broken try it. I tried many paths but the only path I found that was LIFE to me was and is JESUS so that is what I speak. So much testimony of Jesus healing people. perhaps try looking some up and may it bless you friends! I mean just hearing it from one witness you might not believe me. and One you can call crazy maybe, but all those people Jesus healing. Might want to ask Jesus say HEAL ME TO JESUS! I don’t know I just consider that something to consider friends. May God find you and write you in the Lamb’s Book of LIFE! Have a WONDERFUL day dear people! ❤ Written by Michelle Stokes! Love you guys! ❤